dreaming on the impending sunshine

you must imagine yourself to be soft
as the butter in its dish
from the counter tops of 1982
and open as the sky
I look up to every fourth of July
or whenever I notice I’ve lost something
but what if I’m like your mirror
and really you are just as tough
and unfraying as the hemp
tying up my wind chimes all these years
and closed up tight, sleeping
like all pretty flowers before their bloom

propheting on misery never brought me a saviour

the times between
i cool myself
and race through
voices from history
the wreckers in
all of my stories
they resound
their cacophony
until i am deaf
to me

i’ve discovered
i am a figment of
who i once
thought i’d be

and you
you are the one
who disregards
the same old person
who has left me
an untapped resource
you are the person
i’ve already known
you are the only
person i’ve ever met

because i said so

i’ve always
said it would be so

so why don’t you plant a fucking tree already?

you embody the word
potential
look up the #1 definition sometime
i saw it from the second i noticed
the crease in the center of your forehead
and even before that when your lines
were filling up my inbox

now you want me to pretend
like i never shined for you
but i know i did baby
i was radiating
and so were you, yes

rest your star-tipped finger here

because
the truth is i
am you being
me she is
me being she
we are all
ghosting through
pretend spaces
placing our
ideals carefully
out front
so we don’t notice
these soft insides
we say we’re not
on common ground

but
we are
we always are

if time didn’t matter

i could say i loved you
that one saturday morning
when we left our shirts off
and made coffee in my kitchen
we spoke about work
and possibilities
not between us
there was a dance
a back and forth
of me and you
as hands smoothed bellies
and kisses accompanied
words that came so easy and sweet

and the coffee
it took forever